Deletions of the previous fourth and fifth line: |
"Tâtonne" and "Interroge" results in a new total of eight lines. |
Middle of page: |
A handwritten symbol in blue, "#" signifies "more space." |
Fourth line: |
"Puis entreprend" replaces "avant" in the second version. |
Fifth line: |
Chedid capitalizes the letter "s" of "Sa marche" by hand; "Sa marche oblique" is the new fifth line. |
Seventh and Eighth lines: |
"leur fureur" and "leur bienfait" are replaced by two nouns previously deleted in the sixth line which reappear: "silence" and "bruits." |
Seventh line: |
The preposition, "entre" [between] is a new addition; "silence" appears as a singular noun without any definite article; as a preposition of place, "entre," a new deictic element to the text, denotes an unspecified space "between
silence and sounds." |
Final eighth line: |
The noun, "bruit" [sounds] in its plural form becomes the second part of this prepositional phrase "Entre silence/et bruits." After "bruits" a final period is made by hand. Since this poem, "L'Homme" or "VII" is the last poem entitled "Territoires du silence," (Par delà les mots 146), it will end with a final period to signal completion. (The previous six poems and introductory poem to this section do not end with periods.) |
Below the corrected third version: |
Chedid writes the entire poem by hand to define the poetic form more clearly: three lines are separated by the symbol, "#," followed by five more lines. |
New discovery: |
In the fourth line, the pronoun, "il," absent from the corrected third version is added: "Puis il entreprend." |
*Note of interest: |
Chedid has created her own personal sign of completion or "stamp of approval." It is a handwritten mark that appears to be the letter, "Z," the final letter of the Latin alphabet. Chedid usually makes this mark at the end of a poem to indicate a final version. This personal sign has been useful to me in the determination of a final version as her manuscripts are not always found in the proper order. This mark is not found on the page of this final version here, but can be found on the title page of the first version, under the main title, "Territoires du silence." |
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